Now I’ll be the first to admit that “ferocious”, “passionate”, and “dedicated” aren’t words typically associated with women dressed in lingerie. I need not address the disrespect that immediately pops into the head of any guy at the mere mention of the subject.
However, chauvinists be warned: a mere click of your TV remote may incite in you a complete change of perspective.
For those unfamiliar, allow me to introduce you to the fastest-growing women’s sport in America: Lingerie Football.
Since 2009, the Lingerie Football League has been invading home televisions and annoying girlfriends, while maintaining a complete legitimacy as a sport.
Don’t agree with me that Lingerie Football is a legitimate sport? Tell that to former Super Bowl MVP quarterback Mark Rypien, who’s daughter Angela is the starting quarterback for the Seattle Mist. In the first quarter of her game against the Green Bay Chill, Rypien was tackled excessively hard, and in response, punched the woman responsible, resulting in a 15-yard unsportswomanlike penalty.
Now, if your daily combination of Calculus homework and Entertainment Tonight isn’t cutting it for you, do yourself a favor and find some online footage of the Dec 12th, 2011 game between the Philadelphia Passion and the Toronto Triumph. In the midst of the game, a full-on brawl broke out between the two teams.
Let me tell you something: the NHL has got nothing on these girls. And somehow they still look hot doing it.
Assuming you’ve made it this far, it is now time for me to address the detractors who claim that the LFL is “degrading” to women.
You know how I respond to you? Yes, it absolutely is.
So are Hip-Hop videos, Victoria’s Secret ads, and every successful R-rated comedy of the last twenty years. I think people forget that in the early 90’s, Andrew Dice Clay sold out Madison Square Garden with 2 hours of misogynistic ranting. Unfortunately, feminine degradation has become ingrained in our culture and is virtually unavoidable.
What I am simply pointing out here is that unlike the list I just previously mentioned, Lingerie Football doubles as a fascinating, exhilarating, intense athletic spectacle. Beating each other to a pulp while playing aggressive, well-executed football, and still looking hot doing it is truly an art form.
And let’s face it: are their outfits honestly any more revealing than cross-country “short-shorts”?
So gentlemen, next time your significant other tells you to stop “gawking” at the pleasant young ladies on your TV, be sure to acknowledge how fearful you are of ever facing any one of them in a contact sport.
