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Thanks for Sharing?

Thanks+for+Sharing%3F
Graphic by Alex Greene

There are some people, over the past couple years, to whom I have found myself unintentionally devoted to despite how painfully aware I am of all the gritty details in their mundane lives.

Our relationship started when I entered the vast world of social media and our relationship started with a “following” or a “friending.” Soon enough my newsfeeds were transformed into a forum of what seemed like sad or embarrassing diary excerpts.

In case you were wondering, yesterday, Emily broke up with her boyfriend, but today she is “single and ready to mingle.” Jenna just watched Mean Girls for the first time and is “feeling swaggy.” Gabby announced that she hates “ gurlz who steelz her boifwend.” And David ate a chili cheese dog and “ is on the toilet #oops.”

It’s called oversharing. Let me emphasize the “over” part. I am constantly getting minute to minute updates on Emily’s love life and I’m 99% sure that Jenna has a reflex to post on Facebook every single thought that passes through her head. And ultimately my day would just not be the same if I didn’t see at least one complaint from Gabby. I have never gone so far as to share a meal with any of these people, so why they feel the need to share their bathroom habits is beyond me.

Many people ask why I don’t just defriend them or block oversharers, and believe me, occasionally I do. But a handful of people are just too entertaining to delete from my newsfeed. It’s like passing the scene of car accident and not being able to turn away.

Oh? You got new shoes? Tell me more, did you get shoelaces and socks also? Really continue, I’m fascinated.

“So much hw! School sux!” Please, enlighten me with this enthralling discovery as this has never been said before.

It’s a constant struggle whether or not to make the final effort and click “block,” but there’s always that tiny, twisted part of me that takes pleasure getting updated about how annoying your boyfriend is because he won’t answer your texts. It could be the same part of me that enjoys reading those trashy tabloids or that is addicted to watching One Tree Hill or any other teen drama show. It can’t be helped and I’ve come to the conclusion my life just would not be the same without a constant stream of updates about how your cat got sick and you had to take him to the vet.

Sometimes I wonder if Mark Zuckerberg ever thought of limiting the amount of Facebook statuses someone could make in one day or somehow filtering out the really sad ones, but then I just imagine him sitting in his office somewhere and just laughing because it gets to a point where that’s all you can really do.

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About the Contributor
Sophia Hampton, News Editor
Sophia Hampton ’15 can’t quite decide what she wants to do mainly because she wants to do everything. “I can’t tell you what I want to do,” she said, “Because it’s going to change.” Hampton described how, in the past, her varied ambitions ranged from being an editor of Vogue, to being owner of a restaurant, to even being a member of the Peace Corps. Now, however, she has become fixated on another career. After a five week journalism course at Northwestern University over the summer, Hampton decided to take the parts she loved best about journalism- connecting with people through interviews and talking about important issues- and use them it construct her new life plan. With lively passion, she detailed how she would love to be a lawyer. She discussed how she thinks it’s very similar to journalism, since they both would allow her to uncover the truth and “give a voice to the voiceless.” Of course, with Hampton’s ambition, she wastes no time getting started. When she wanted to own a restaurant, she became president of the culinary club.  So when she wanted to become a lawyer, she took up a summer internship at a law firm right after her journalism program. But she playfully acknowledges that her dreams have changed before, and makes sure to add, “Right now I am so down to be a lawyer, but don’t be surprised if you find me in 30 years and I’m a marine biologist.”  

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