Tips for turning around your terrible team

Bailey Ethier 15 dominates on the field and on the computer screen in order to become the ultimate football machine

Adam Kaplan

Bailey Ethier ’15 dominates on the field and on the computer screen in order to become the ultimate football machine

Bailey Ethier, Editor-in-Chief

You sacrificed weeks of your time researching. You read every article from every source and looked at every stat.

You came up with the perfect plan, and then executed it to perfection.

Running backs Ray Rice and Adrian Peterson of the Baltimore Ravens and the Minnesota Vikings were going to carry your team to victory. And you counted on Washington Redskins quarterback Robert Griffin III to bounce back.

Then video footage of Rice punching his then-fiancée was released, a grand jury indicted Peterson on charges of reckless or negligent injury to a child and Griffin got hurt in the second game of the season.

On top of that, Rice was cut from the Ravens and received an indefinite suspension, Peterson was placed on the NFL’s Exempt/Commissioner’s Permission list and must “remain away from all team activities” and Griffin could be out for the rest of the season with a dislocated ankle.

While your fantasy football team may still be winless, there’s plenty of time to turn it around. All you have to do is follow these three steps to attain a championship.

Buy Low, Sell High

Fantasy football is often likened to the sports version of Dungeons and Dragons. Wrong. Fantasy football is not the sports equivalent to some silly game. Fantasy football is the equivalent to Wall Street.

Stock brokers make money by buying stocks when their price goes down and selling stocks when their price is high. The same applies in fantasy football. If you own an inconsistent wide receiver, trade him following a 20 point game, not a five point game.

Or if another owner’s tight end has had a few bad weeks in a row, trade for him then and give up less than you would’ve had you done the trade following a 25 point outburst.

If some dude from Canada was able to trade a paperclip for a pen and then for a doorknob, and so on until he traded a movie role for a house, you can trade and work your way up from New England Patriots wide receiver Aaron Dobson to a fantasy stud such as Detroit Lions wide receiver Calvin Johnson.

Play the Matchups

If I were to say Houston Texans running back Arian Foster is better than Kansas City Chiefs running back Jamaal Charles, I would be utterly wrong.

But if Foster is playing a team with a sub par run defense, while Charles is up against a team that possesses a great run defense, you have to at least consider playing Foster over Charles. For example, Foster is worth a start over Charles if the Texans were playing, say, the Jacksonville Jaguars while Charles’ Chiefs face-off against the Seattle Seahawks.

This idea extends even more so when determining what defense to start in your lineup. No one would argue that the San Diego Chargers’ defense is better than the San Francisco 49ers’ defense. However, if the Chargers are playing the Oakland Raiders and the 49ers are playing the Denver Broncos, it’s worth giving San Diego a shot.

Don’t Rely On Monday Night

If your starting tight end is questionable to play on Monday night, you’re better off playing it safe and starting your backup tight end who is backup playing who is playing on Sunday. If your starter is unable to play on Monday night, you won’t be able to sub in anyone else (unless you have another player of that position playing on Monday night). And aren’t some points better than no points?

If these tips help you bounce back from a slow start, you’re welcome. But if they don’t, its your fault for drafting a terrible fantasy team.