Two Thumbs Down

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Two Thumbs Down

Nicole DeBlasi, Staff Writer

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At the Oscars, celebrities spend thousands of dollars on clothing and jewelry (and I mean thousands. Those Zuhair Murad gowns Jennifer Lopez loves so much start at $5,000.) Gossip magazines go crazy over this event, talking about the best and worst-dressed and the nominees. However, I think the Oscars are as boring as watching paint dry.

It’s not that I don’t love movies.

In fact, I enjoy going to the movies with my friends. I just don’t see how watching hosts make lame jokes (James Franco, anyone?) and actors make long speeches thanking people they’ve known since grade school is entertaining.

Greer Garson holds the record for longest acceptance speech, which he gave in 1942 at the Oscars, at five minutes and 30 seconds. I don’t know how anyone could have listened for that long.

Also, I don’t care who wins. The Oscars aren’t exciting to watch; I don’t get on edge waiting to hear who won. I can just find out the results the next day. That’s what newspapers are for.

In general, I don’t find the hosts at award shows funny. In 2011, Anne Hathaway and James Franco hosted the Oscars (awfully, I might add). James Franco sounded dull and uninterested; there were even rumors going around that he was high during the Oscars. Maybe he was. Anne Hathaway tried to engage Franco (and even her own mother) into their jokes.

At the Golden Globes this year, Tina Fey and Amy Poehler were the hosts. I watched their opening monologue a couple of days after the awards show, and I thought they did an alright job. Some of the jokes were funny. The sketches in which they acted inebriated? Not so much.

Seth MacFarlane is this year’s host, and I hope that he’ll be funny. (He’s good at poking fun at other celebrities.) He was great in “Ted,” and, in interviews, he always has something amusing to say.

In fact, he might be the only reason I’ll watch the Oscars this year, so I can see his opening monologue. But then I’ll stop watching.

Of course, there are the outfits. If I didn’t know what the Oscars were and saw how crazy Yahoo, People Magazine or any other celebrity news source got over the outfits the actors and actresses wore, I would think it was an award show for fashion.

I like fashion, but the Oscars aren’t about the clothes. Magazines should write more articles about the nominees instead of the outfits.

Lastly, people don’t get to vote on who they want to win the awards: the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences votes on the best movie, best actor, best actress and more.

There is even an award for makeup and hairstyling; I didn’t know people paid attention to details like that while watching a movie.

This is why I think the People’s Choice Awards are better than the Oscars. At least we have a vote in that one.

I don’t see my favorite movie of the year, “The Hunger Games,” on any of the lists of nominees, and it was amazing. Jennifer Lawrence played Katniss really well, and the action scenes were awesome.

Similar movies that were up for nominations at the Golden Globes, such as “Lincoln,” “Silver Linings Playbook,” and “Zero Dark Thirty,” are up again for awards at the Oscars. Granted, I didn’t have the pleasure of watching these movies, but, regardless, why don’t they put up different movies for nomination?

All in all, the Oscars, and awards shows in general, are the most uninteresting thing on television. I’d much rather spend my time watching something else.

Even Honey Boo Boo is more appealing.

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