The best ways to spring into spring things

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Maybe it was the consistently negative temperatures, the 10 feet of snow, or maybe it was just everyone whining about it on every social media outlet available, but this winter seemed, in particular, tremendously awful.

The cozy sweaters and snow days and hot cocoa seem to be all fun and games at first, but when it gets to be March and I still obtain hypothermia walking five feet from my car to my house, I start to get frustrated.

According to my calendar, it’s officially spring. So let’s start acting like it.

Maybe you’re like me, and you have the two brain cells that it takes to see that iced coffee is blatantly superior to hot coffee and to never stop ordering it. Otherwise, get smart and start getting your coffee iced. As the weather slowly but surely transitions away from that of an arctic tundra, iced coffee will be the far more refreshing drink of choice.

Teenage boys, this is your time to shine. Trust me when I say that nothing shows off your true manliness and bravery like exposing your knobby knees to the freezing cold. And also trust me when I say that we’re all getting tired of you recycling the five identical pairs of khakis you own. Let’s shake it up for spring.

Amidst the humdrum of the winter months, we all get a little early-2000s-Avril-Lavigne-goth and sink into a monotonous rotation of muted, dark and mildly depressing color schemes. As famously said in “The Devil Wears Prada” by all time queen Meryl Streep, “Florals for spring? Groundbreaking.”

Sure, maybe your thermometer, your weather app and your mother will tell you that it’s too cold to shift into spring. But the sooner it’s spring, the sooner it’s summer. So let’s get things moving.